ladycaviar (ladycaviar) wrote,

  • Mood:

you think YOU hate the DMV

Let's see. This week:

It was unclear if they ever actually issued a warrant for my arrest or just threatened it, but since I didn't actually steal a car and flee the state, that's all cleared up now.

I'm ever so glad I spent so long with a bank manager to make sure my check would clear just so that the bank would ignore that arrangement and hold the deposit for a week because such a large deposit was "out of character" for my account.  Do I pay extra for that personal touch? Perhaps I should cancel that service...

The DMV finally saw the light and rescinded their decision to suspend my license and fine me $500+ for not insuring a car I don't own, only to then consider charging me with stealing and falsifying my own personalized plates. Two days to straighten that crap out.

Remember when I first returned to Virginia, and they wouldn't take my Idaho license at the DMV because the clerk didn't believe Idaho was a US state?

Next time you're at the DMV, you might consider yourself lucky and not bitch if you just have to spend 45 minutes in line. Just sayin'.

So in tribute, here are the best haikus evar, written by this great kid I met online.

This is a Haiku
It is the best one ever
Oh wait, it’s over

I am so awesome
Some may say I am badass
Give me money, kid

I love the ladies
They want to get in my pants
No, wait, please don’t run

I had lots of cash
The government stole from me
Freakin’ tightasses.

I hate all haikus
5-7-5 really sucks
Damn, I just wrote one

I seem to offend
With all of my bad language
Fuck that shit, cockass!

My identity
This thing was stolen from me
They bought a hot tub

I cannot drive yet
I do not have a license
I stole a car, though

I write stupid crap
Just like this stupid haiku
I just stole a car

I am up to this
I can write these through the night
I am just insane

Ow, I just got shot
I am bleeding profusely
Someone call a doc....

Who thought of haikus?
They made it complicated
What a big weirdo

He fell off the roof
Oh wait, that would be a lie
I just pushed him off

I am desperate
Looking for inspiration
I just stole a car

Tags: car, hilarity

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.