ladycaviar (ladycaviar) wrote,

yeah, I write crackpot letters, too

Dear Nabisco:

I love Organic Oreos.

However, I've moved to [redacted] and I can't find them! My local grocery store says they can't even order them from the distributor. Do you still make them?

Please don't tell me you don't make them anymore. I will cry. I will die of despair and my lonely Oreo-less ghost will haunt your offices moaning about Oreos forever.

Look, I don't care that they're organic. Really. But there's something about the recipe made without corn syrup that makes them sweet, and light, and amazing and I WANT MORE. I love them. I dream about them. They're amazing.

I would order them online if I could. I google them, and I can't find them.

I'd order them direct from you if I could.

How may I obtain the caviar of Oreos?

Do not make me come there with a glass of milk and a machete.

Ok, no seriously. How do I get them? Who has them?

Respectfully, and not in a dangerously crazy way,


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